This last weekend we finally put up the Christmas tree and all its associated trimmings. This meant that it was also the time for my annual lecture about how the Christmas tree is not a toy, and neither are the ornaments. Actually, it wasn't so much a lecture as a series of shouted admonitions aimed at not breaking quite as many ornaments as feared during the tree-decorating frenzy.
Ironically, while many of the ornaments on our tree look like toys, they're not. They actually seem to be make out a plastic-like substance that breaks if, for example, you look at it. This, coupled with the sheer irresistability of the toy-like ornamants to small children led to considerable ornament carnage in our house over the weekend. Our kitchen counter was turned into an impromptu Christmas tree ornament triage ward where Spongebob Squarepants, the Grinch, and a wooden elephant all lay ready to undergo emergency surgery. "Super Glue—stat!" I shouted to my trusty nurse, who, being at the other end of the house, suggested I get it myself.