Helping Your Child Through Anxious Moments
Marin Mommies presents a sponsored article by Meredith Simpson, LMFT, from Wellspring Psychotherapy Center in San Rafael.
Anxiety is a common part of childhood and often shows up during transitions, separation, social situations, or new experiences. While it’s natural to protect children from discomfort, avoiding anxiety-provoking situations can unintentionally strengthen fears over time. Research shows that children build confidence and resilience when they are supported in facing anxiety while feeling safe, understood, and capable.
At Wellspring Psychotherapy Center in Marin, we provide families with developmentally informed, evidence-based approaches to help children navigate anxious moments. Below are strategies parents can try at home.
1. Communicate confidence in your child
Rather than trying to eliminate anxiety, focus on expressing confidence in their capacity to handle it. You can say, “I know this feels scary, and you can do hard things. I’m here with you,” to help your child internalize a sense of competence without increasing anxiety through excessive reassurance.
2. Co-regulation: Calm your body first to model how a child can calm theirs
Children are attuned to their parents’ emotions and read nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions and tone of voice, to determine whether a situation is safe. When parents slow their breathing and soften their tone, they send cues of safety. Taking a moment for a slow breath to regulate your own body and emotional distress can help your child learn to use the same tool to regulate theirs.
3. Reflect feelings without reinforcing fears
Reflecting your child’s feelings helps them feel safe. For example, “You’re feeling worried about what might happen,” rather than reassuring or debating the fear. Reflection does not mean agreeing with anxious thoughts; it communicates understanding, which often helps settle anxiety.
4. Keep anticipatory periods brief & praise bravery
Anxiety can peak before a challenging moment. Keep explanations simple, state the plan clearly, and follow through with calm confidence. Once the moment has passed, praise your child to reinforce confidence: “You did something hard even though you were nervous.”
As Wellspring’s Clinical Director, Meredith Simpson, often reminds families:
“Our goal isn’t to make anxiety go away, but to help children learn they can handle it, and that belief changes everything.”
Wellspring specializes in therapy for children and families, helping kids develop emotional regulation, confidence, and coping skills. We offer in-person therapy in San Rafael, including parent coaching, and telehealth services throughout California. For a complimentary consultation, call 415-300-4055 or visit wellspringpsychotherapycenter.
Meredith Simpson, LMFT, is the Clinical Director of Wellspring Psychotherapy Center in Marin. With over a decade of experience, she provides evidence-based therapy for children, teens, and families. She prioritizes collaboration with parents and is certified in Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT), a parent coaching model for young children that equips families with effective tools to address challenging behaviors.
